010 | BAR REPORT: Getting Sticky at Jeremy's Ale House

A night of bras, beers, and beating the Spurs. (Spoiler: Great outdoor seating is HERE)

When I was just a wee intern, I would walk around downtown Manhattan aimlessly after work in the hopes a group of very cool, older girls would take me under their wing and swoop me to their local hangout spot where another group of very handsome, older boys were waiting. We would all sit outside and flirt, our cool totes that couldn’t fit laptops or changes of shoes hanging from our seats, and chitchat about their jobs as galleristas or baristas or other occupations that end in -istas. They would think my outfit was very chic and my time in central Pennsylvania for college was amusing, novel even.

Obviously never happened. That summer, I wore my bank-branded backpack stuffed full like a turtle shell, never befriended a gallerista, and stunned in Old Navy slacks.

But I did find a downtown bar to sit outside of.

Welcome to Jeremy’s Ale House.

They serve giant beers and Aperol spritzes.

One of the great joys in life is sitting outside in New York City with a massive beer/Aperol spritz/Diet Coke, and Jeremy’s provides. What the place lacks in classy decor and a Dimes Square location, it makes up for with its outdoor seating in the historic Seaport district. There is a small porch with stools that offer excellent people watching and tables and chairs set up wobbly in the street below.

A very blurry photo from last night to show you they have outdoor seating.

My favorite time to go is during the day to avoid the crowds. It is one of my go-to locations for catching up with friends over a Sunday afternoon drink and is in perfect proximity to both a McNally Jackson bookstore and a walking path by the East River waterfront if we want to extend our time together.

Seaport Public Market by Naima Rauam

Last night, however, I went much later than usual and ventured past the outdoor seating of my dreams to the underbelly of the beast so I could watch the Knicks game with friends.

As someone who isn’t much of a night owl, the times I do go out I want to go all out. Being in a crowded bar makes me feel like I am living, as controversial as they might be. Especially if I am a part of the crowd itself with a group of friends, I tend to have a blast, especially if the bathroom line isn’t too long and getting a drink doesn’t take years off my life.

Jeremy’s last night was both crowded and fast, and I was a part of the crowd.

This man needs to be rewarded for his speed.

Under a ceiling covered in women’s brassieres and scribbled on foam tiles, I ordered a beer the size of my head, a Coke, and two seltzers from a brand that definitely wasn’t around when I was in college. I pushed through the sea to find the seat my dear friend Annalise had saved for me, and we all scream-talked at each other very loudly and laughed even louder, until I started getting worried my eardrums were going to pop right out of my head. Then we went outside, through the porch doors, to be with the classy outdoor drinkers and cigarette smokers until we cooled down. It was a cycle of this and was a blast.

Artistic.

Last night, there was no bouncer and a lot of cheering. The crowd was a bit younger than usual, which I verified by overhearing some talk about the lines at Parker House and the Princeton getting out of hand. (Nightmare material.)

New York’s lack of space has resulted in nightlife locations shapeshifting to fit the clientele depending on the time of day. Bars that cater to just one type of person go under after that type exhausts their time there. They move on to the next. Places like Jeremy’s are able to stick around because they can catch what is thrown at them (and because of their outdoor seating).

I recommend going to a crowded bar with your friends. Scream and laugh. Then go to that same bar a few weeks later during a different time of day and marvel at how empty it is and how the entire essence of the place has shifted.

The next sunny Saturday, go to Jeremy’s with a few people. Even better, go during the day or right after dinner. Have the whole place to yourself.

Enjoy.

Views from my ride home. I love New York.