005 | How to Get Out of a Reading Rut

The precise way I picked reading back up and some book recommendations

I am a binge reader, going through phases of absolute obsession with anything written in front of me, and then the next week my stamina for reading goes out the window and the longest thing I’ll read is an essay about a messy breakup or a spiritual awakening someone had after seeing Lena Dunham speak on her book tour (which I am incredibly jealous of). I want to be in a constant waterfall of reading books, but for some reason, it just comes to a halt every few weeks until I find something that sticks with me.

Last year, I got myself out of a reading rut by finding one style of book and sticking to it, so my brain didn’t have to work as hard to get into something new. Our brains like routine, and I think when the next book feels like a seamless handoff from the last one, you can just keep going without rebuilding all of that momentum from scratch. I wasn’t flip-flopping between topics or adjusting to a completely different writing style every time I finished something, and that consistency helped me pick up the next book (almost) immediately. I don’t think this is something you should do forever, but if you’re struggling to read consistently, narrowing your focus for a while really does help. I was worried that if I made too big of a change between books, I’d fall off like riding a bike. An abrupt crash and then long standing feelings of bike hated to follow.

While I am constantly listening to audiobooks, they are mostly celebrity memoirs read by the author. My books are different and serve a different purpose. The style I landed on was a very specific kind of novel, all New York based or at least New York adjacent, with a female narrator I didn’t necessarily like. They are low plot with a high psychological focus, and there is proximity to wealth and status, and most of the story is driven by small decisions rather than big events. The prose is generally restrained and controlled, which contrasts with the chaotic inner life of whoever is narrating. Identity is always a little unstable, and there is a constant ambiguity around control and what’s actually going on.

I think I like these books because the main characters are so deeply unlike me. I have a deep-seated want to be likeable by most people, while these women have no interest in being liked or even redeemable. I treat my entire life like an opportunity for growth, which is occasionally exhausting, and in these books, there is absolutely no growth. It’s more of an observation of their behavior over time, and it’s oddly relaxing.

I’m going to walk through three books that fit this mold, starting with the one I’d recommend least and ending with my favorite.

My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh is where this whole themed marathon started. I actually read it for the first time a few years ago at the same time as my mother, and I reread it this time around with less anxiety about conversations about the book over dinner. If you haven’t had the chance to read it (which is hard to imagine since it has been all over the place for years), it’s about a disaffected woman in New York who uses drugs to withdraw from life for a year, isolating herself and sleeping in hopes of getting rest. It’s dry and dark and is the first book I ever read where the main character just opts out of life entirely. There are a lot of reviews about it so I won’t bore you. It wasn’t my favorite and I hated the narrator, but something about a female antihero tickled my fancy and made me want to find more books like it. If you’re in a reading rut, I don’t actually think this is the one to start with, but it is the one that set the pattern for everything else I read after it.

The Coin by Yasmin Zaher is the next one I’d recommend. I read this with my old roommate and I thought it was well written, but I don’t think I will read it again. I would like to read another book by the author though. A very image-conscious woman in New York goes through life in a very routine way, focusing on taste and perception, and any small disruption unsettles her more and more. She is fragile and throughout the book you see her crack until she ultimately breaks. Everything felt so tightly wound the entire time, and you could sense that something was going to give. I think where it lost me a little is that by the end I didn’t feel like I got that much out of it, and it left me a little cold, but it is a well-executed spiral and I think it’s worth reading if you’re interested in this kind of book.

The Guest by Emma Cline is my favorite of the three, and the one I’d actually tell you to read first if you’re going to try any of these. The book follows a young woman who is drifting through the Hamptons, moving through social situations and circles she doesn’t really belong to, and she relies on her manipulation and survival instincts and charm throughout the whole thing. What I loved about it is that Emma Cline doesn’t overexplain anything, and you’re just watching this woman move through space and making your own judgments about her, and the whole thing has this low hum of tension underneath it that never really lets up. It isn’t very long so you can probably get it finished in a few days, if not one day with great weather and an iced coffee outside.

I do want to note that these are very depressing books. If you are in an emotional slump or going through something or struggling with your mental health, these are probably not the ones to reach for right now.

On a lighter note, I am currently reading Sex and Rage by Eve Babitz, which shares similar DNA to the books above, but isn’t as grey and gloomy. Similarities: the narrator is moving through the elite and aesthetic world in a way that feels familiar, she doesn’t quite fit into it, and there are strong focuses on relationships and social positioning, and the identity is fluid, and the book is very observational. Differences: there isn’t really a spiral the way there is in the other three. It’s far warmer and more romantic, and it feels more about movement even if there is little direction within that movement. I like the narrator and I hope for her, which is a nice change after spending time with women I didn’t particularly root for.

If you know of similar books, please share. If you ever got out of a reading rut, please share. If you hate all of these books, keep it to yourself.

I hope you get back into reading.

Now excuse me while I go audiobook Lena Dunham’s new memoir.